


Sleepless in Halifax

by Iwassupposedtostudy



Category: Gentleman Jack (TV)
Genre: Anne's tired, But Ann is keeping her up., F/F, Features Miss Snores-a-lot, I don't know if it is, I'm tired, One-Shot, Sleep, So Anne plots her death sort of..., tbh I'm too tired to be the judge of anything, this was supposed to be funny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-17 08:28:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28722138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iwassupposedtostudy/pseuds/Iwassupposedtostudy
Summary: I was bored, couldn't sleep so I wrote this. Was inspired by Anne's journal entries as well as a HILARIOUS cartoon by Bisa_pop.Yeah. This is just a one-shot - I might delete it later because I can't open my eyes enough to proof-read it. So sorry.Anne is unable to sleep due to Ann's loud snoring - and so she lays awake planning on how to get rid off her.
Relationships: Anne Lister (1791-1840)/Ann Walker (1803-1854)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 45





	Sleepless in Halifax

Anne adored her wife with all her heart and soul. She loved her to death, and she would do anything to make her happy – she would walk on glass for her if need be. There was nothing she was so fond of in the world as her wife. For her she would even get rid of her pocket-watch and thermometer. Anne loved that woman to pieces, and she would never do anything to hurt Ann.  
But those sentiments lay far, far away at present…  
  
Anne’s whole body tensed up as another loud snore was heard, and she bit her inner-cheek as her eyes shut tightly in pure annoyance – grabbing fists of the cover to try and calm herself – but it was fruitless. She remained just as tense as before.  
Ann was unaware, of course, of her wife’s distress and lay peacefully asleep on her pillow, seemingly mocking Anne who lay fully awake though the hour neared three despite her being desperate to rest her knackered body.  
“Urgh.” Anne groaned as Ann sounded again, and she resisted an urge to push Ann out of bed and onto the cold hard floor. Because replacing Ann’s snoring with yelps of pain weren’t going to make things better for herself. Anne exhaled loudly, but Ann slept still– drooling all over her pillow making Anne’s mouth curdle further as she stared at her relaxed features with contempt – eyes stinging from fatigue. Ann inhaled quietly but then snorted out a snore making Anne’s blood boil,  
“ARGH! For the love of God…” Anne hissed quietly, clenching her jaw and gritting her teeth – how could such a small woman make noises that loud!  
“Shut up!” Anne snarled but to no avail – Ann was sound asleep and took no notice of her wife’s irritation.  
“I can’t stand it… I can’t stand it. I can’t!” Anne breathed frustrated – the lack of sleep was really getting to her and she pressed her fingers against her forehead, trying to stop her head from hurting.  
“Don’t push her out of bed, Anne… don’t do it…” She told herself quietly, closing her eyes to try and compose herself but the will to do so vanished with another gruesome sound.  
“Right. I’ll just have to get rid off her then.”  
Anne raised her hands from the covers exasperated, glowering at her sleeping wife – seriously contemplating on how she might execute this whole operation of getting rid off her snoring wife.  
“Hm… Maybe… I escape to Paris, change my name and start a new snore-free life and then I will be blessed to sleep at night... But I won’t be able to return to Shibden. And Marian would… No, that’s not good. Think, Anne… think.”  
Anne’s eyebrows furrowed as she tried to reason somewhat clearly despite the fogginess that clouded her tired mind, pressing her fingers against her temples, rubbing them gently,  
“I could always procure some arsenic and accidently slip it in her tea… ‘woops, some women just can’t hold their…’ no. That won’t look like an accident, and prison is… hm, likely to have other people snoring there… and the beds… eh. Hm…”  
Anne rubbed her chin as she glanced at Ann again, and her eyes happened to find one of the pillows just as Ann made a sound that might as well have come from the depths of hell,  
“Perhaps… if I just press it over her face for a little bit…” Anne pondered, tapping her fingers against her chin - she was growing more and yet more desperate for sleep with every passing second.  
Anne blew air out of nose, opening the drawer to her nightstand – pulling out a sheet of paper, grabbing her pen thinking she might be able to plan the whole thing better if she wrote it down and kept her thoughts organised.  
She fiddled with her pen for a bit as she tried to focus but it was difficult work when Miss Snore-a-lot lay beside her making those loud noises. It was truly a wonder, Anne thought giving her wife a death stare, that the rest of the household were still asleep.  
Anne then began drawing up her plan of how to rid herself off Ann – but halfway through the disastrous sketch of herself pushing Ann in-front of a carriage or alike, she was filled with slight guilt and abandoned that ridiculous plan and instead began to wonder how she might convince Ann that it was a good idea that they slept in separate beds some nights – after all, all the fashionable people do it Ann… Anne thought, starting to scribble down something like that on the paper. But it was an impossible feat to concentrate on writing and Anne crinkled the paper up into a ball and threw it down on the bed - dragging her hands over her tired face,  
“Please shut up!” Anne whined into her hands, on the verge of tears from pure exhaustion – she had things to do and people to see in the morning and she needed to sleep badly.  
But Ann snored again, and it was the last straw for Anne, she threw herself out of bed, wobbling slightly as she stood up on the floor, running a hand through her hair before turning around to eye the enemy on the bed.  
And Anne softened for a second, wondering if she might’ve been a tad overdramatic as she observed her gorgeous wife on the bed – her chest heaving up and down peacefully – and Anne thought she might crawl back in but then alas, a snore escaped Ann and Anne pursed her lips and shook her head irritably – ‘Not today Satan, not today’ Anne thought bitterly as she swept out of her room and into Ann’s for some much-needed sleep.  
  
It was absolute heaven to crawl under the sheets, and Anne rejoiced in the quietness around her – thanking the Lord that the walls were thick enough to close Ann’s snoring out. Anne pressed her face to the pillow, sighing content – closing her eyes waiting for sleep to whisk her off to the land of the dreams for a while.  
‘But what about Ann…’  
The thought came unbidden and Anne groaned, pushing her face harder into the pillow – trying to force her beat body asleep.  
‘She will wake up and worry…’  
Anne moaned into her pillow willing the thought away so that she could sleep.  
‘Ann will think you’ve abandoned her…’  
Anne growled loudly, laying her head under her pillow – pushing it down over her head thinking the thoughts might leave and give her peace so she might rest. But no matter how stubbornly Anne tried to rid herself of these thoughts and the ever-growing guilt dwelling within her for having left her wife – they wouldn’t heed her, and she remained awake much to her own chagrin.  
Eventually Anne sat up vexed, exhausted and angry and she snatched her pocket-watch from the stand - opening it with unnecessary force. Anne grumbled as she saw that she was already ten past four and she had yet to fall sleep. Needless to say, Anne wasn’t looking forward to today – she would be absolutely shattered come morning.  
  
Anne dragged her legs with her over the floor about to head back into her own room and to Ann – she couldn’t sleep without her and she couldn’t sleep with her – clearly Anne was never to sleep again.  
Just before she opened the door, she glanced at the floor thinking it looked rather comfortable – wondering if she should try and sleep under the bed – the snores might not reach her there and she wouldn’t have left her wife. Anne shook her head before opening the door, bracing herself to hear the snoring once more. But there was none of that and Anne opened one eye glancing towards the bed apprehensively, her heart racing in her chest as she for a second feared that Ann had died in her sleep.  
“Pony?”  
It was all it took for Anne’s anger and frustration to melt away, and she even managed a small smile as she approached the bed,  
“Mm?”  
“Where’ve you been?” Ann wondered as Anne crawled into the warm bed again – nuzzling into Ann’s side – inhaling her scent as she closed her eyes, thinking she might be able to sleep now.   
“Nowhere.” Anne mumbled against her and Ann licked her lips before opening her mouth,  
“Oh, so you didn’t leave to plot my death then?”  
“What? What are you talking about?”  
“Well, I found this piece of paper in bed and… um…” Ann trailed off, holding it down in-front of Anne, and Anne forced her heavy eyes to open and she flushed when she saw it,  
“Ah… well, you see… I might’ve gone slightly insane there for a second due to lack of sleep and your snoring, which happen to be louder than thunder.”  
Ann frowned, and swatted her over the head lightly, trying to deny it,  
“I don’t snore.”  
“Really? Hm… In that case, we should probably call the reverend over so he might exorcize the devil, that takes over your body at night, out of you.” Anne told her well dry and Ann tried to appear angry with her but failed as laughter escaped her,  
“Aw, Anne - I’m sorry… in my defence I’ve got a bit of a cold… but you could’ve just rolled me over.”  
“Roll you over?” Anne scrunched her forehead together, too tired to even begin to think on her own,  
“Mm, Elizabeth used to roll me over when we had to share a room on occasions.”  
“And you’d stop?” Anne raised an eyebrow and Ann nodded,  
“Yes.”  
“That’s all it would’ve taken?!” Anne cried distraught and Ann bit her lip to stop the chuckles from erupting as she watched Anne’s miserable expression and the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes.  
“M-hm… and you now, Anne – you can wake me up if I snore – I don’t mind. I’d rather that than you push me in-front of a carriage in a fit of sleep-deprived rage.” Ann told her with a smirk and Anne moaned,  
“’m Sorry… I don’t want to kill you nor get rid of you. Its… I was… am just so tired. Desperate for sleep…”  
Ann smiled down amused at her silly wife, feeling all the sympathy for her – wrapping her warm arms around Anne, kissing her over the dark hair, and on the side of her face whilst gently caressing her over her back – managing to lull her to sleep within minutes. Thinking to herself, that she might need to make habit of this – of cradling Anne to sleep, if only to prevent murder.


End file.
